The Culture of Complaining: Are You Stuck in a Mind Trap?

While waiting for my dentist appointment a few days ago, I was scrolling through YouTube and TikTok, watching random videos. I was also silently hoping my dentist wouldn’t guilt-trip me for missing my last check-up as he is a specialist in making you feel responsible for all the world's misfortunes!

Back to the videos. I stumbled across some entertaining accounts where British people were passionately complaining about their own country.

One video featured a lively English girl with what I’d call a Mediterranean temperament, dramatically begging to be “adopted” by another country. In her eyes, the UK was simply awful and she had a whole list of reasons to back it up: https://www.tiktok.com/@phoebeisginger1/video/7467591669332970785.

Then there was another account, this time on YouTube, featuring a British man with a different approach. His video mixed sarcasm with evidence-based comparisons between the UK and China, pointing out what he believed to be its many flaws: https://youtu.be/t3g84irdNns?si=JmEn5L8ivEHnv7V2.

The funny thing was that he was talking about Bloomsbury, my old neighbourhood in London, and I couldn't agree more. But this constant complaining was so relentless that it frustrated me even just listening to it.

I won’t lie, I laughed a lot. And I needed it. The alternative was to sit there imagining my dentist extracting his revenge while repeating his favorite phrase: “Beauty requires sacrifices”.

But after the laughter, a more serious thought crossed my mind. Having lived in the UK for six years, if you asked me what I would change about the country, I wouldn’t list the weather, the rigid structures, the lack of healthy food, the grey daylight, or any of the other usual complaints. These things, to me, are simply part of the UK’s character.

No, what I would change is something deeper, something embedded in the culture itself: the obsession with complaining.

The Art of Complaining: A National Sport?

I’ve lived in six countries and traveled to more than twenty across different continents. Nowhere have I encountered a culture of complaining quite like the British one. It’s as if people are born with a natural talent for it, as if complaining is not just a habit but a well-practiced art form.

Sometimes, it even seems like complaining gives life meaning. I’ve met people who appear to take genuine pleasure in finding something, anything to criticize. And don’t get me wrong: as a perfectionist and a firm believer in continuous improvement, I fully support analyzing mistakes, identifying root causes, and striving for better solutions.

But what these social media creators were exposing, albeit humorously, was something entirely different. They weren’t just pointing out flaws; they were highlighting a mindset.

It’s the attitude of constantly blaming external circumstances while refusing to take action. Complaining about the weather, the cost of living, the government, the lack of sun: yet staying in the same situation, repeating the same patterns, living in the same misery.

Because deep down, many don’t actually want change. They prefer the comfort of complaining over the effort of transformation.

And that, I absolutely hate.

You are Not a Tree: Move!

This isn’t just a national habit; it’s a personal choice. And the truth is, it applies to all of us.

Your feet have no roots. You are not a tree. If you don’t like where you are physically, mentally, emotionally…you have the power to move!

You have been given free will and a rational mind. You have the ability to shape your life. Every day, you face a choice: complain or change.

Complaining feels free, while change requires effort. But here is the mind trap: what seems easy and comfortable today will lead to years maybe a lifetime of being stuck in the same place.

To escape that prison, you need creativity, flexibility, and above all a life purpose.

So stop complaining. Change what you don’t like. No one is coming to save you, absolutely no one.

The genie in the bottle? That’s you.